Every Girl Is Not a Whore!!

   A couple of months ago, I went to substitute for a high school history class at the school district in "the hood".  The first two periods went pretty smoothly, they were ELL classes and not more than ten, pretty mellow, students in each class.  The rest of the day was a bit more work, not because I was teaching or grading papers or anything.  Some days, just maintaining a level emotional state, while keeping the mob (students) from destroying the classroom or running wild, seems to be the real work of a substitute teacher.   (I doubt that the teacher even teaches at some of the schools I have been in, they just give out the assignment and collect work from maybe 20% of the class.  One student told me that their teacher gives them the work to do, but tells them, "the option to fail is yours".)
   Perhaps it was third period, the students came in (noisily) and filled up the seats in the classroom.  I took attendance with the help of  the TA.  (If the kids are too loud, I do not even try to read out the attendance, why bother, I will just lose my voice by the end of the day if I try to compete with their noise.)  At least ten minutes after the bell a lanky boy, I'll call Jake, sauntered in and sat at the back of the classroom.  When my aid, an older gentleman, asked this kid why he was late, Jake told him to "shut up"!  I walked quietly to the back of the room and asked Jake to apologize to the man, which he did begrudgingly.  I told him what the other students were working on and asked him to get out his book.  I went back to the teacher's desk and continued my vigil.  I noticed right away that Jake had no intention of doing any school work, instead he was busy bragging to the boys seated near him, of his recent conquests (real or imagined).
   I watched them, listening and considered my options.  I have learned, over the years, as a substitute teacher and a regular teacher, one has to be careful of actions taken.  Having expectations of civility in a classroom, can backfire.  These boys were not whispering, rather talking in a normal volume about the things they had done to some unwitting girls.  Jake was proudly talking about his penis and about how the "cunt gets wet".  They were discussing who was a "ho" or a "slut".  He had his cell phone out (the use of cell phones in school is a blog unto itself) and showing some pictures to those around him.  I walked back to Jake, again, and quietly asked all of them to refrain from inappropriate conversation in the classroom, and to put his phone away.  Of course the response I got about the phone was "our teacher lets us!".  I repeated my request and let him know that if he did not comply I would send him to the school office with a referral.  Well, he put the phone away, and after a few minutes of quieter talking, they were back to the sexual slurs and bragging.  At that point I did ask Jake to leave the classroom, of course he resisted and said he didn't do anything, I repeated my request for him to leave, adding that I would call for security if he did not.  I asked the aid, whom Jake had told to "shut up" to escort him.  With much protest and some nasty sexual slurs aimed at me (but deflected nicely thanks to my protective energy sphere) Jake finally was out of the classroom.  The other boys shortly found another topic of conversation now that their "fearless leader" was banished.
   Later, at lunch break, I asked some of the Russian girls who were eating in the classroom how they felt about boys talking explicitly about sex in the classroom.  They told me it made them feel "very uncomfortable".  When I was in my teacher credential program, we were taught that it was our job to make the classroom a safe place for all.  How can this possibly be considered safe for teenage or adolescent girls, (many of whom are struggling against relentless pressure to maintain abstinence) to be bombarded daily with explicit, lecherous, sexual gossip and slurs.  Many of these girls (immigrants or not) come from religious families with a strong moral code when it comes to sexuality.  Even if they don't, even if some of these high school girls have had sex, it doesn't mean that they are whores!  Virgin or not, girls (or boys) at such a young age should not be forced to listen to the contemptible chronicles of some self proclaimed teenage lothario.  When I was that age, I would have been mortified to have been subjected to such bravado.  Even now as a mother of two grown children, I still don't want to hear it, especially in a classroom coming from some punk  younger than my own kids.
   This is not an isolated incident, there have been many times in a classroom that I have witnessed this kind of sexual harassment.  Kids will be playing their ipods loudly with lyrics such as "eat that pussy" or "fuck the bitch".  I have even heard girls loudly asking other girls "are you on your period?  Is that why you're such a bitch today?"  "High expectations", "safe environment"  if a teacher tries to uphold such standards as the pedagogy demands, they are not always welcome at a school that is more concerned with filling classroom seats than with maintaining the environment necessary for academic success.